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Responsibility.

My Journey. My Responsibility.

When things get tough, or when they don’t work out as I envisioned them, I must take responsibility—for me, being responsible means taking ownership of my actions or inactions and the consequences, irrespective of how the situation came to be. Now, this doesn’t mean that I’ve always made the right choices. It means acknowledging what I should or could have done or didn’t do and owning up to the fact that I need to get back on track or rectify where I went wrong. Now, I believe that we should also show compassion in taking responsibility, but showing compassion is next month’s topic. For this month, it is all about taking responsibility. Shit happens. It’s not always our fault, but what happens next is our responsibility. So, what does that mean? Well, here’s my 5 cents. It’s my way of looking at the world, and if it resonates with you, great. If it doesn’t, that’s great too. It’s your 5 cents now, so do with it what you may. My goal is to give you a different perspective, my perspective, on taking responsibility.

Taking responsibility is challenging for many of us. How we originally envisioned achieving our goals doesn’t come to pass. Maybe no fault of our own, but we leave it at that and have no problem blaming the shit that happened as the reason why we haven’t been able to get things in order. I’ve been there many times. I had the best intention and plan of action. I was motivated and ready to go, and then life happened. And that trajectory I was on, well, that switched faster than your tone when you’re about to say “fuck” and your grandma walks in the room. So, what did I do initially? I blamed life as if I was incapable of adapting. 

Here’s the perfect example. BeFit@Home was not my initial vision. Initially, it was supposed to be BeFit@Work, a company that focused on taking fitness and nutrition to workplaces to benefit their employees. I envisioned this company about three years ago, and the decision to quit my decent-paying job and venture out on my own didn’t come lightly. There was a lot of fear, and it took an insurmountable amount of courage to build my vision and move forward with this venture. I would talk to my friends and family about it regularly. I studied holistic-nutrition part-time for two years. And finally, I was ready. I quit my job in January 2020, went into holistic-nutrition full-time to finish early, and had my first business proposal prepared for signing on March 15th.

You can guess what happened next. Along came our year-long friend COVID-19, and due to uncertainty, my school pushed my holistic nutrition exam back by months, and I lost the business contract as fast as I had it. Now, I was able to deal with the exam, and I had hoped that I could potentially win that contract back after the 2-week stay at home order. However, after three months had passed, things weren’t looking too hopeful for winning that contract anymore. My business model was no longer useful, and it was unlikely that it would be for quite some time. COVID-19 was here to stay, and offering fitness and nutrition services at the work establishment wasn’t feasible anymore. My business was failing before it even got started. So, what did I do? I did what most people would do in a situation like this. I panicked. 

I mean, I had just quit my job, and that panic led to another bout of fear and self-doubt that I can’t begin to describe. Was this a sign? Did I make the right choice? Did I wait too long? I should have done this three years ago! Or perhaps I should have waited longer? You name it, I thought it. And at first, I blamed COVID-19. And that certainly was the cause for what I had lost, but what could I do? Nothing. I was so wrong because the longer I chose to do nothing, the longer nothing would change. And not COVID-19, but I would be the cause of what I continued to lose if I didn’t change. 

That was a definite setback, and it took me a month to get myself out of the self-doubt that plagued my mind. Should I try to secure a job until COVID-19 blew over, then try my venture again? Should I try to get my old job back? Should I get a new job? Or should I kill my savings, ride this storm out, and hope for the best. I decided I had come too far to turn back, and I spent the next four months revamping my strategy and determining how I could make the best of this situation. I decided to try a different angle, and BeFit@Home developed. Was I making the right choice? Yes, or no, that doesn’t and never mattered. What matters is that I made a choice, and I’ll need to live with it irrespective of how it plays out because that is my responsibility.

Now, what happened re COVID-19, happened to everyone, and it was no one’s fault. And although not everyone is fortunate to have a choice that may lead to a happy result, we all have a responsibility to ourselves. What happened, happened, and there is no changing that. The fault doesn’t matter, and neither do the circumstances. What matters is that from that point onward, you have a choice. Ideally, we want that choice to yield the best possible result, but that is no guarantee, and we must accept the consequences of what that means. So, even if we decide to do nothing or choose to do everything yielding to nothing, that was our choice. And that is what taking responsibility means to me. 

For me, taking responsibility requires doing five things;

  1. Separate what happened from what is happening
  2. Separate what is happening from what could happen
  3. Have compassion for what happened and what is happening.
  4. Acknowledge that what can happen next is your choice.
  5. Accept the consequences of that choice.

Fitness and nutrition are lifestyle changes, and sometimes we fall behind where we want to be. You must acknowledge what was and take responsibility for what can be. And although there is no quick fix, understanding how to take responsibility for your actions or inactions, irrespective of the results, will keep you accountable and is necessary if you want to achieve your goals. I wish you good health, happiness, and fulfillment! From your mindset to your lifestyle to your nutrition, take responsibility for your choices, actions, or lack thereof.  

And remember, to live your best life, health and fitness are not optional, but neither is it a one-size-fits-all solution. You must find what works for you, and I’m here to help you if you want.

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