Resurgence.

My Ultimate Resurgence.

RESURGENCE. I love this word. For me, saying this word is like meeting that dog whose bite is as bad as its bark. Resurgence is the beginning of your second start. You set a goal, and guess what?! You feel like you failed to achieve it, and time didn’t stop to care. Something is different, though. Now, you have experience and knowledge that you didn’t have before. And although this doesn’t negate your fears and doubts, you have another opportunity to apply everything you’ve learnt, try again, and continue on your journey. It’s a fresh start. A RE-fucking-SURGENCE!

Resurgence happens after you’ve stopped trying. You fell. Hard. You got the wind knocked out of you and likely said, “fuck it. I can’t do this.” However, one day you pass a mirror, do a double-take, and say to yourself, “No, I’m not done. Not yet”. With a pair of fresh eyes and new information, you evaluate your situation and how you will overcome it. Finally, you are ready to try again. “Jamie, how does that work?” you ask. Well, here’s my 5 cents. It’s my way of looking at the world, and if it resonates with you, great. If it doesn’t, that’s great too. It’s your 5 cents now, so do with it what you may. My goal is to give you a different perspective, my perspective, on creating a comeback from a setback—a resurgence.

To me, your resurgence is when your experiences and your desire for change revitalize you. You are acknowledging you tried, but you fell short. You believe that you’re not there yet, but you accept that you are closer than when you first started. You’ve learnt many things along the way and are ready to test out your new theories. So when I resurge, I attack with even more conviction than when I started. But, here’s the challenge, you still have to deal with the emotions. The feeling of failure resurfaces. The fear re-emerges, the doubt comes back, and the feelings of inadequacy start to plague your mind. The trick is reminding yourself of the FACT, that you are not the person you were when you started. There have been many moments of resurgence for me, and to be honest, I believe that is how it should be. But, there is one situation I am particularly proud of and want to share with you. 

It was final exam time at Brock University. However, there was one particular subject where the final exam was worth 55% of my overall grade. I believe it was Organizational Behaviour. Unfortunately, due to the program’s size, there were different exam dates based on the instructor and class times. So, I did what any other average human would. I checked my exam date and put it into my calendar. I had one month to prepare—more than enough time. Right?!

A week passed, and I got a call from my classmate asking me if I was ready for our exam. I confidently replied, “Bruh, I still have like three weeks to go.” Want to guess what he said? I’ll save you the trouble. He said, “Jamie, wtf are you talking about? You have until tomorrow, 1 pm.” My eyes widened, and my jaw dropped. I thought maybe he was mistaken, and we checked the schedule together, hoping that I was right—Nope. I was dead wrong. I had misread the date and was royally fucked. At that very moment, I went into a state of despair, and I gave up. 

This situation felt hopeless. I had a minimum of eight chapters to study, no study notes prepared, and four more exams to worry about. I felt like a failure even though I had worked hard in this class and knew that I could ace this exam if I had the time to prepare. I thought “Perhaps, I could plead with the professor?” Nope! I was required to prove my inability to write the exam, and I knew the excuse “I fudged the times up” wouldn’t work. Maybe I could fake sickness and quickly get a doctor’s note? Nope! My conscience wouldn’t allow it. I didn’t know what to do with myself. I immediately prepped for the worst case, and I stood in the mirror anxiously, thinking about how I would break the news to my parents and ask them to pay for the course. Again. And at International rates, I might add.

I’ve disappointed my parents before (read My Motivational Habits). And here I was about to do it again. I was so overwhelmed. I took a shower, and the tears came. But out of nowhere, I started laughing. I realized I’d been in this position before. I’d dealt with this kind of pressure back in college. I failed that exam, but that’s not the point. I didn’t give up then, and I wasn’t ready to give up now. I still had time. Not a lot, but enough to, maybe, turn this situation around. My fear of disappointing my parents turned into my desire not to disappoint them, or myself for that matter. So I threw on my clothes, grabbed my books and started speed reading on my way to the library. I didn’t stop until my exam the next day. And I’m proud to say I got a B+ on that exam.

In my opinion, a resurgence takes seven things;

1. You made a valiant effort, but you fell short.
2. You gave up on trying. Not a break. You fully believed you had given up.
3. You took a retrospective look at what happened, and you learnt something from your experience.
4. You acknowledge that you are a different person from where you first started.
5. Your desire to achieve your goal is still strong.
6. You see something different you can do that may lead to you achieving your goal.
7. You desire to put your learnings to the test and try again.

Your resurgence requires these things to happen before you can make a comeback. Because if you didn’t give up, it means you’re still trying. And that’s called Resilience (my last blog post – Applying My Resilience).

I’ll be honest with you, though. Sometimes, that comeback never comes. And that is nothing to be ashamed of. But, if you ever start to experience the urge to try again, I encourage you to take it because once you’ve given up, a resurgence is the only way back. 

There isn’t a one-size fit all solution when it comes to fitness and health. And your experiences with resurgence will be different than anyone else’s. And that is A-Ok. Because as long as you understand how to resurge when you have the opportunity, you’ll be closer to achieving your goal sustainably than when you first started. That is always a beautiful thing. You must find what works for you, and I’m here to help you if you want.